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Shattered cover

Shattered

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+Follow this book Book Description | Author's Comment

A Christian family must deal with the fall-out of a single violent event that strikes one of their own.

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HELP!

help me find mistakes and things to make this chpater better! :)
To help with this request, please reply below.
Created: August 21, 2012, 5:19 pm
  • dgillespielaw
    September 18, 2012

    There are some significant problems with verb-subject agreement from the beginning. There are a number of places where sentences end with prepositions. While, in recents years the practice of ending sentences with prepositions has become more acceptable, it should be used sparingly.

    Additionally, there are some problems with the prose. Your flow is interrupted a number of times through misplaced commas and some under developed sentences.

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  • Diane Carter
    August 22, 2012

    I would be happy to review your book and offer suggestions.
    Diane, Paradise Publishers

    0 of 0 people think that this is a great idea, do you? yes no Reply | 1 Reply| Flag
    • Hal Penley
      August 22, 2012

      I'm always finding spelling, grammatical, and format issues with the ebooks I've read. I would be glad to review and comment. I'm not a professional editor or publisher, but I believe I can contribute to your effort.

      0 of 0 people think that this is a great idea, do you? yes no Reply | Flag
  • soccerstar
    August 22, 2012

    I'm new to this website, so I'm not sure how to "help" people yet, but i'm sure that your book is great!

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  • James
    August 21, 2012

    2nd paragraph change chose too choose and I think you can take the third sentence out ( They target everyone the same) and not loose anything.

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